Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Can we say worst mommy?

At least that is how I feel when this happens. Know what brought this on, I introduced a new book.
I know I am such a horrible mom. We have a series of readers for him to teach him how to read. The series has different levels to them. He recently mastered the set he was on so his dad and both felt he should move on to the next level. Well he did not think so, My stubborn little child. Everything starts out fine I am calm and he is to. Then he starts to fight at every little thing. It is so frustrating that I want to scream by the time that dh gets home for lunch. He then steps in and trys to help. I mean he is fresh and not stressed at all. Gabe works for him a little better. As you can see though in the picture. He still can frustrate.
So does any one have any ideas on how to get him to respond better to the new book? I know that it is not because he is not ready. He shows all signs of reading, he just hates having to work. He prefers to play all the time. PLEASE HELP!!!! Any ideas are greatly appreciated.


Montessori At Home said...

Hi -
I follow your blog! I also homeschool 2 boys ages 2 and 6. What I would suggest is this . . .Find something a story, a experience that will motivate him naturally to tackle new challenges. I also follow the blog, moveable alphabet - a Montessori teachers day to day experiences. I recall a story, where a boy was not showing any interest in practicing his letter sounds to make words so he could read. The teacher did not force it but waited and tried to find some kind of "in". The boy was involved in a project of constructing a boat and then the boy saw a book of the boat George Washington constructed. The boy was extremely interested in the maps George Washington used to navigate his boat. The very next day the boy worked all day with the moveable alphabet making words and working on sounds so he can read. This continued for days. He was internally motivated with such a beautiful fervor to practice so he could read George Washington’s map. How cool is that. In our house I always try to find something to motivate the boys to get them to want to learn instead of me forcing it. Although sometimes I explain to them in life there are some things we must learn and may not enjoy practicing. It is something we have to learn, so we can become well-suited to live in this world.

I hope that story helped. Look for something to inspire the challenge of trying new things, maybe the Wright brothers and how they constantly challenged there thinking and talk about how when we do that we strengthen our minds to produce even greater thoughts and ideas.


Kari said...

Do you have a problem motivating him with rewards? For my son's reading in Kindergarten, mom and dad have to write down the title of the reader and sign that he did it. Then at school, he gets two stars on a "stamp card" I think there's 20 squares. when that is full, they get a prize from the prize box. then when the sheet of book titles is full, they get another.
Last night son did not want to work on the reading with any real effort, just wanted mommy to fill in all the words. So, I calmly said, "if you don't do the work, I can't sign the paper, and you wont get the stars at school." He IMMEDIATELY started working. How great is that!
I know at home, the "prize box" could mean all sorts of things. at least, with reading, even if we have to bribe for awhile, once they can read, it's not like we'll have to do it again!

I would also suggest putting the readers all in a bucket and letting him pick, or at least be used to them, so they aren't necessarily seen as NEW work. Maybe offer 5 readers each week, with 2 or 3 being "new" ...or some format like that.

Kari said...

oh, and there's no such thing as being a bad mommy when it comes to teaching our kids to put forth the effort and gain endurance and stamina, and pride, and achievement.
keep up the good work!

Robin (rsislandcrafts) said...

I know that bad Mommy feeling all to well. We are HS our 9 year old son. We also HS our older two (17,20). I always had the hardest time getting the boys to read! With Robbie (9), we leave the new books out for a week before we plan to introduce them. This includes new workbooks, etc. Then when it is time to use them, he is used to them being around. He usually looks through them before it is time.

Robbie loves to read, but it still can be a challenge to actually get him to do it on a regular basis. I have learned to never choose his books for him. He goes to the library and picks out his own books. If he picks 5 new books, he must read 3 of them. No choice. He has learned to read the back covers to see if they will interest him.

Sometimes we just have to set aside a book/assignment for another day. We found that when we both get so frustrated that one of us is crying or yelling, then it's time to step away from the school work and do something fun. We usually bake cookies :) Then we can sneak in some school stuff and talk about what happened. That's one of the many benefits of HS :)

Fingers crossed for better days...

Mrs. Darling said...

Yeah I think too that montessorri may be the answer. But there now you read my blog and know my struggles with Tink so I really have no new input. I feel for you.